I write whatever I want, my english are bad to be honest. If you hate bahasa rojak and you are a grammar police, my blog is not a great place for you to visit. Peace.
i stayed up until 3.00 a.m. to study.
and i still cant answer my final exam.
i hate myself for being dumb as fuck.


It was a weird feeling,weird coincedence,
that she felt it weird, but true.

It was a wish, simple wish,
that she never wish of, came true.

A coincedence that was very unexpected,
A simple thing that made her so incandescently happy.

She took a courage,
to do something that she wouldnt think she can,
but she did it.

A very small courage,
Not so powerful she would say,

Its doesnt matter
if the girl can takes his heart,

But it does matter
if the boy will break her heart,

She may but possibly will not get him
She knew that,
thats why she decided to choose quite
She knew that,
there was no coincedence of liking each other,
and it is a wish that she wishes, that will never comes true .


This is not a poem as you can see...

Let me tell you about one fact about me,
that might not be comfortable for some of you, especially girls.
I get well with boys more than girls, in term of being friend, of course.
You girls might think Im a bitch or slut or whore, but I dont care.
It not like Im dating them or something.

I have a lot of friends, but most of them that I close with are boys. Old primary school friends that I still contact are boys, only a few girls.. I dont why it just happen like that?
Anyway, I know that women are created with very delicate heart, very emotional, very easily to be a loveable person (is that word even exist lol) . I dont know about men, but my mindset said that men arent very easy to have those 'deep' love than women.

But I guess I was wrong?

A few of my guys friends, especially my best brofriend (that i recently made a poem for him with him knowing because i think its embrassing to me for he to read it haha) . Shared their thought, their problems about their girl. Girl, I must said, not a woman.

But their love, are so strong. I always wow-ed with it. A guy who couldnt have other girl because he still cant move on with the girl he loves that left him THREE years ago (for me , lama gila) ,a guy who his girl cheated on him, then left him, then came back to him, and texted another guy, ignored him again, but my friend is still madly in love with her and couldnt leave and still believe in her *facepalm* . A guy who gets a girl who never try to understand him and moreeeee.

But what about my girl friends' story? Most of them are unrequited love.. Sad, indeed.Nothing interesting story to write here as example. Maybe there are, but I dont know it since they dont tell it to me. Urmm..

Okay letme continue about my guy friends, they can become so stupid sometimes that made me pissed of with them. Some of their girl dont appreciate their love , which i dont know why. If i were them i would REALLY appreciate everything what my man did for me. Ok la, i cannot judge them based on one sided story, i dont want to involve with people relationship takkan nak tanya girlfriend dorang semua. The only thing I could do is to advice to my friends , since Im a girl, i know girl attitude 'better'.. Im always giving advice so that their relationship can stay stronger and longer.. Depends storynya macamne, usually im on the girls' side (guys, they are so hard to understand us haha), but ada few times im on my guy friends' side..

The point is, I couldnt hate the girls who always break my friends' heart , the girl i couldnt be on their side , because I think I broke someone's heart too.


But my story are kinda vice versa. I didnt get the attention as I want. I didnt get a 'goodluck' wish, I didnt get the 'offer' of taking picture together during important events. I always did the first move. Yea i know its bad for a girl to do like that. But that the only thing at least I can do to keep the 'bond' , while he only did after I made the first move. Probably the story of us, are not in happy ending because of  our egos. He did he best, I saw it. But I just couldnt let it continue. Because I knew, i would get the same treat as I used to, because he is a busy boy.

And its make me wonder, there is a big possibilities for him to tell his problem, his heartbroken to another girl, as all of my guy friends told to me about theirs. The girl might do what I usually do, the girl might think Im a dumb and ungrateful girl who dont appreciate that guy. But I hope she, or he , will tell him that he deserves a better girl, nicer girl that I am. He has a long times ahead, when the right time, he will meet that girl. I will tell him that, if I were her.

My thought right now is, every relationship needs to have commitment from each other. Understanding, cares, love and much more. Belum lagi bila dah kahwin bagai anak bagai semua. I dont know why Im brave enough to write this on my blog, my friends might read it lol, might laugh at me, or probably mad, I would probably get lectured with many grammar mistakes here. HAHAHAHA.


Best brofriend.

I want to tell you,
about a boy who is a friend of mine,
became a boy who was silly to have affection on me,
but i againts,
the boy then become a friend of mine,

Time passed by,
the boy is still my friend,
who is always there for me until now,
who always hear my story from the beginning,
until the end.

People said it impossible for a girl and a boy,
to become friend,
but I never believe it.

Because here he is,
a one fine boy that God sent to me,
for he to look after me, for I to look after him,
for us to take care each other well,

He has a girl he deeply madly in love with,
im happy for him as he is happy with her,
I always wanted the best for him,
as he wants the best for me.

But time will always passing by,
one day he'll get marry ,
and i made a vow to myself
to leave him when that time comes.

I dont regret against the affection,
because having him,
as a brother, as a bestfriend,
is one of the best thing that i have in my life.

That is all,
about a best friend of mine,
about a boy who is like a brother of mine,
about my best brofriend. 

A poem from Linda

My dear, Mr.Lance,
The days you bewitched my soul and mind,
The days you wrote me a song and poem,
I wish I kept it but I didnt, I couldnt,
because you wouldnt let me keep your heart.

My dear, Mr Lance,
I forgotten about you as years went by,
but everytime I read poems , 
its remind me of you,
what kind of sins did I commited,
that I couldnt let you vanish out of my mind.

My dear, dearest Mr Lance,
My love to you may not be strong,
as Edgar loves his Annabel Lee,
as Juliet loves her Romeo,
but my love to you,
will forever I cherish and bury in my heart.